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Obeying ABC's Of Memorial Rules
Losing someone close can affect each person in a very different way. This time is particularly difficult for the family members who are dealing with their own grief while being responsible for making arrangements for interment. Following some of the simplest guidelines to proper funeral etiquette can make the loss much more tolerable for everyone who wishes to pay respects to the lost loved one.
Generally speaking, utilizing a bit of discretion and practical common sense will guide one through most situations. For all others, there are a few basic principles that may be applied. It is important to note that should the deceased have made special requests or belonged to a religion or culture with specific traditions, those should be followed by all attendees as a matter of respect.
Deciding what is considered proper attire for funerary services is one of the top topics of discussion. Unless there were specific style requests left by the deceased, or required by their cultural or religious beliefs, the rule of thumb is to wear something in black, dark blue, gray or deep brown which all symbolize mourning. Take care to dress conservatively to show respect and to avoid drawing attention to oneself.
It is important that one not show up late to the funerary services. If possible, try to be there about fifteen minutes early so that one has time to greet fellow mourners and still be seated before the proceedings are ready to commence. When delays are unavoidable, enter quietly and remain at the rear of the room or wait outside to avoid disturbing others.
Condolences should be offered to the family members to express sympathy for their loss. Remarks should be brief and sincere, whether delivered in person or in a written correspondence, avoiding the urge to offer advice on how to cope with grief. Sharing a special memory of the deceased is a sweet gesture though one should take care not to make themselves the center of the story.
The main thing to remember is that the purpose of this service is to allow family and friends to say farewell to someone who was important in their lives and to share special memories. Observing proper funeral etiquette creates a smooth flow to the proceedings and decreases the chances of distractions that may upset the bereaved. Using common sense and showing respect for all involved are good guidelines to follow when in a situation where one is unsure of what actions are expected.
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