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Shoffstall Funeral Home


Obeying The Facts Of Funeral Rules

Losing someone close can affect each person in a very different way. This time is particularly difficult for the family members who are dealing with their own grief while being responsible for making arrangements for interment. Following some of the simplest guidelines to proper funeral etiquette can make the loss much more tolerable for everyone who wishes to pay respects to the lost loved one.

For the most part, one only needs to use their best discretion follow common sense in order to know what is best. There are, however, a few basic tips that everyone should know for general purposes. Keep in mind that when the deceased has left specific instructions as to what they wish mourners to do and wear at their services, or when their religion or culture have traditions in place, those wishes take precedence over all other guidelines.

Deciding what is considered proper attire for funerary services is one of the top topics of discussion. Unless there were specific style requests left by the deceased, or required by their cultural or religious beliefs, the rule of thumb is to wear something in black, dark blue, gray or deep brown which all symbolize mourning. Take care to dress conservatively to show respect and to avoid drawing attention to oneself.

When attending a service, it is important not to be late. It is customary to arrive at least fifteen minutes prior to the start of service so that one may be seated and situated before the family begins to enter. If an unexpected and unavoidable delay should occur, enter as quietly as possible and either stand or sit in near the back so as not to disturb the proceedings.

One may offer condolences in person, through phone calls or by sending cards and letters. However they are delivered, they should be brief yet sincere messages without any well meaning advice on dealing with loss as that may be better appreciated at a later date. Most appreciate the sharing of memories as long as the deceased remains the center of focus.

Remember that the purpose for such ceremonies are to pay final respects to someone dear to all who attend and to provide an opportunity for them to share treasured memories. General funeral etiquette keeps the proceedings flowing smoothly, avoiding upsetting disruptions and maintains focus on the honored deceased. These guidelines are primarily matters of respect, discretion and common sense and can help anyone who is unsure of how to behave among the bereaved.


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