Each person grieves the passing of a loved one in their own unique way. This time may be especially stressful on the family members who are having to contain their emotions in order to make important decisions and proper interment arrangements. When all mourners follow the basic funeral etiquette guidelines, it helps to relieve some of the burden on the bereaved and allows everyone to say their personal farewells.
For the most part, one only needs to use their best discretion follow common sense in order to know what is best. There are, however, a few basic tips that everyone should know for general purposes. Keep in mind that when the deceased has left specific instructions as to what they wish mourners to do and wear at their services, or when their religion or culture have traditions in place, those wishes take precedence over all other guidelines.
Deciding what is considered proper attire for funerary services is one of the top topics of discussion. Unless there were specific style requests left by the deceased, or required by their cultural or religious beliefs, the rule of thumb is to wear something in black, dark blue, gray or deep brown which all symbolize mourning. Take care to dress conservatively to show respect and to avoid drawing attention to oneself.
One should make great effort to not be late to the services. The guidelines dictate that arriving fifteen to twenty minutes early is considered respectful to all involved and provides ample time for sharing condolences before the proceedings begin. Should a delay be unavoidable, either wait outside or enter as silently as possible and take a seat in the rear of the room so as not to disturb others.
Expressing sympathy and offering condolences to the family is more important than one may think. Kind remarks are appreciated though they should remain sincere, brief and free of well meaning advice, whether delivered face to face or in a card. It is acceptable to share a special memory as long as it is told in short form and the focus remains on the deceased.
These types of proceedings allow family and friends the opportunity to exchange touching memories of a lost love one, to pay respects to the bereaved and to say their final farewells. Emotions are high and sensitive during these times and following funeral etiquette reduces the risk of anyone becoming more upset than necessary. If unsure of what is the proper thing to do, one would do well to resort to common sense and discretion.
